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The Small Journey

I would say that my life as a Christian technically started when I was little, as my mom would take me to church quite often. Although, I would never come to understand what they would preach, and I really only saw it as "fun time." Throughout my childhood, I would continue to go to church with my mom, and sometimes with my siblings. Again, the problem here is that I never knew the word or understood what exactly was going on in life.

Fast-forward to my middle school to high school life, I practically stopped going to church at this point and really only went like a couple of times through the span of 3-7 years. The funny thing, I found, was that I always considered myself as a Christian, always believed in God, but never actually did things that a Christian would do. My mom always preached, even if we didn't go to church, about the greatness of God and I believed her. But this sort of life never really caught on at this point of life, and I definitely sinned quite a bit without much thought to it.

Approaching my time in University, I didn't have much outlook on faith and just came to get my degree and go. At one point, I even questioned why people went to bible studies, with my rationale at the time being, "they're just reading this book." Still in my heart, I knew that Jesus was the Lord and Savior of my life without even knowing what that meant.

On a fateful day, I went to my first event of Chi Alpha without even knowing what a Chi Alpha was, and I gave my contact information to Brennan and Wes. Months would pass and I would not really engage with Chi Alpha much until one day near the end of the semester of fall 2020. Where Wes approached me, along with Sophia (now a friend of mine) and talked to me about their testimonies of Jesus. Then came that fateful question of if I wanted to let Jesus into my life and really dedicate myself.

For some background, I always had problems with getting friends and always had to deal with loneliness. I had to deal with a lot of people who didn't really value their lives as much as I valued mine; more or less those who were broken and didn't have much direction. Carrying that weight was rather immense, I had to deal with my own problems while also attempting to burden myself with the likes of other burdens and problems. It gave me this sort of internal conflict that slowly ate away as time progressed. Without knowing, I needed some help and essentially this meant to be saved. And you can say that God, through his Holy Spirit, showed himself to me when Wes came to ask me that question.

I didn't think about it for long, it was almost like some sort of instinct. I told Wes "yes" and decided to really dedicate myself to Jesus. Finally putting what I said I was to effect. What I learned was that Jesus loves all of us, and that we can all be saved. After that meeting, I felt rather refreshed, and this was honestly unprecedented as I didn't think it would be such an immense help. But to accept Jesus into my life, I really did do something correct.

Over time, I got to know Jesus more and more through the word of the Bible, and had to deal with attacks from the enemy, Satan. And the more the quality of life improved. Not only did my loneliness mostly go away, but I was also finding myself able to make friends of people. It truly has become something beautiful, and I wanted to give thanks to all of those who has helped me in my small journey.

On the current note, I still struggle with things and I'm not afraid to admit my imperfections. But I am glad I made the choice.


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